Before opening the gift, the boss shook it slightly, and noticed that it was wet in the corner. A housewife takes a lover during the day, while her husband is at work. See TOP 10 birthday one liners. It was a blow out. A man gives his wife an expensive bottle of wine for her birthday. Birthdays really take the cake . Get the best daily dad jokes in your inbox. Funny birthday jokes, even those from the always optimistic Jerry Seinfield, add ... 34. I hear that r/Jokes has the highest childbirth rate. 32. Search for: » Subscribe (daily dad jokes!) The unhappy wife asked why her husband didn’t buy her a present, he replied that she asked to be surprised. I don't know if it will be popular or not. He called up his 30-year-old daughter for some help. 31. Birthday Bar Jokes The Boss Some employees bought their boss a gift for his birthday. On your birthday the only thing that will go up is your age. Email. 34. That remains to be seen. Her husband came home unexpectedly, so she hid her lover in the closet. What did one candle say to the other? I am over 18. With celebration comes great laughs. Photo: Nicole Fornabaio/RD.com. She needed an upgrade. Advertisements. For the 55th biurthday you may send birthday wishes via a SMS or a greeting card. So, sit back and get ready to read some of the funniest birthday jokes around. Photo: Nicole Fornabaio/RD.com. The punniest website ever! Spread the love . NSFW language, obviously. See TOP 10 birthday one liners. When is a birthday cake like a golf ball? All sorted from the best by our visitors. 37. Page 2. A coconut cake. 9. Funny 34Th Birthday Greeting Cards - CafePress. Sound the a-llama - it's your birthday! 9 Year Old Jokes . Jan 31, 2014 - Because the best way to show someone you care is by viciously insulting them. If you’ve got a few jokes of your own, share them below. Touching his finger to the wet spot and tasting it, he asked, "A bottle of wine?" photo: iStock. Joke 34: Q: What does a birthday cake and a baseball team have in common? His employees replied, "No." He burps 7-Up. Because people keep making jokes in the comment section. 58. One that's a soap-prise. Check out our ridiculously funny Dad jokes, kids' jokes or, for that special someone... love jokes! All sorted from the best by our visitors. 59. 35. Game of Thrones star Emilia Clarke jumps out of a plane on 34th birthday, jokes ‘who says you can only fly dragons’ Emilia Clarke went on an adventure to celebrate her 34th birthday. You could make the usual birthday party full of fun and excitement by telling them some birthday jokes for kids. 37. Enjoy these funny birthday jokes from Beano's joke geniuses! What they don’t tell you is that you won’t miss it very much. Let’s See If You Can Answer These Birthday Jokes… Q: What do you give 900-pound gorilla for his birthday? Donald Trump Birthday Meme If Someone Makes Fun Of Your Age There Will Be Hell Toupee. Childbirth Jokes. 1. The kind your dad would tell. 100+ Happy Birthday Funny Wishes, Quotes, Jokes & Images Looking for Happy Birthday funny wishes, quotes, jokes and images to put a smile on someone's face on their birthday? Not aware that 9 year old son was hiding in the closet. www.cafepress.com › funny 34th birthday › Stationery. What do you call a fake noodle? 10. “Why don’t you invite all your old high school buddies?” she asked. 36. When it’s been sliced. It’s a rule. … Man to wife, “Blow out your candles and make a wish”. Nice belt! 35. Because it’s too hard to put them on the bottom. Congrats, you’re 60! 12) My pupil asked which writer wrote the best dinosaur stories. What do penguins sing on a birthday? - Melanie White. by Stephen. How do you make a tissue dance? 13) Our local museum has opened a brand new dinosaur exhibit. Absolutely hillarious birthday one-liners! What happens when your dad chugs 8 sodas at your birthday party? Photo: Nicole Fornabaio/RD.com. . Put a little boogie in it. A: He wanted to have a birthday potty. Absolutely hillarious birthday one-liners! and add it to your stomach. They tell you that you’ll lose your mind when you grow older. Hoppy Birthday! 57. . I was going to make a joke to mark your birthday but the fact you’re still alive is nothing short of a miracle and should be celebrated! Dave Barry I have never admitted that I am more than twenty-nine, or thirty at the most. ... What do you say to a kangaroo on their birthday? Wishing you a happy early birthday so I don’t have to remember it later. We hope you find what you are searching for! Don’t birthdays just burn you up? Your pants creep upward as you get older. The largest collection of birthday one-line jokes in the world. Thank you to all who posted kind birthday wishes. Skip to content. https://www.everythingmom.com/jokes-for-kids/best-birthday-jokes What did the computer tell its owner on her birthday? Did you see the sale on birthday candles? Don’t miss these wild (but true!) 34 Most Funny Donald Trump Birthday Memes Images & Pictures. Take the edge off of any upcoming birthday jitters with a few 40th birthday jokes about finally getting to the top of (and going over) the hill. 38. I’ve kept the receipt for the gift, y’know, just in case you didn’t make it; Some words of wisdom for your birthday – … by funnyexpo September 3, 2017, 4:56 pm 8.4k Views. 34 of them, in fact! 36 / 75. Why were there balloons in the bathroom? 40 is when the phone rings on Saturday night… And you hope it isn't for you! Birthdays are a time of surprises, wishes, entertainments, cakes, and having tons of fun. 30th Birthday Jokes: More Funny Quotations. "A bottle of scotch?" Aug 19, 2019 - Quotes birthday funny hilarious 34+ Ideas #funny #quotes #birthday The best Birthday Jokes on the internet. Apr 21, 2015 - funpoop.com is your first and best source for all of the information you’re looking for. 11. Shop Funny 34Th Birthday Greeting Cards from CafePress. The largest collection of birthday one-line jokes in the world. 110 Birthday Jokes For Kids. Freeze a jolly good fellow! 55th Birthday Wishes. Photo: Nicole Fornabaio/RD.com. Funny Birthday Jokes That Ladies Love. Following is our collection of years puns and sixteenth one-liner funnies and gags working better than reddit jokes. 60th Birthday Jokes – Birthday Jokes For Men. By 60 you’re a pair of pants with a head. 34 / 75. Check out our favourite birthday jokes with these puns. I can't believe you're seven already - it seems like only yesterday you were six! And if you'd like some more age-appropriate humor, check out 50 Dad Jokes So Bad They're Actually Hilarious. You're looking glazed over. Related joke collections: Knock Knock Birthday Jokes and Pizza Jokes. When the candles won't fit on the cake you know you're getting old. Celebrate a birthday with our collection of birthday jokes guaranteed to make anyone feel special. Whether it's for him or for her, a friend or a colleague, or maybe even a belated birthday wish, we've got you covered with our huge selection of funny birthday wishes. If your child's having a dinosaur birthday, jokes with the same theme will keep your guests laughing! Donald Trump Birthday Meme Happy Birthday Provided You Show Me Your Birth Certificate. When I got into my 30s, and especially when I became a parent, my concept of “fun” changed, becoming less likely to involve people getting high or hammered or naked, and more likely to involve balloon animals. Birthdays have inspired some of the funniest birthday jokes, quotes and sayings. A: It was really sappy. Freeze a jolly good fellow! What do penguins sing on a birthday? Happy Birthday! Time to start yelling at the television. 35 / 75. A: It was pound cake! Or maybe you need something a bit more specific? Sourced from Reddit, Twitter, and beyond! The rest of you will be un-friended tomorrow. 1. tales of the world’s dumbest criminals. So when it’s someone’s birthday, someone who is closer to your heart, the occasion is extra, extra special. The boy now has company. From general topics to more of what you would expect to find here, funpoop.com has it all. The Librarian says "Try over there in the C section." Why do we put candles on top of a birthday cake? The husband responds: “Is that you or the wine talking.” Wife: “This is me, I’m talking to the wine”. This joke may contain profanity. Donald Trump Birthday Meme I’d Never Deport You No Matter How … Little Tina always sings happy Purr Day to her cat once a year. This joke may contain profanity. So read on, and enjoy! Birthday Jokes. 8. Joke 37: Q: Did you hear about the pine tree’s birthday? A few months before his sixtieth birthday, George began planning his party. What did the cake say to the donut? What's the cleanest type of birthday party joke? They generally associate their birthday with gifts, cakes, birthday bumps, celebrations, and friends. on January 29, 2013. What's hairy and covered in fondant? Pickles celebrate their birthdays by relishing the moment every year. Man wakes up and says nothing. Funny Birthday Jokes. Thanks subscriber, I'm dad! After a few glasses the wife blurts out, “I love you”. Turning 60 means: No More Tank Tops. 34. A woman walks into a library and asks for a book on childbirth. His father said, “Son, we’d give you one, but the mortgage on this house is $280,000 and your mother just lost her job. 21st jokes that are not only about 8th but actually working birthday puns like I was visiting my daughter last night and asked if I could borrow the newspaper and What s the difference between someone falling from st floor and st floor. Joke 35: Q: Why did the boy put candles on the toilet? 36. Birthday Quotes and Jokes, Group 5. Did You Know… When your age and the date of birth are same, it is a special day known as your Golden Birthday. Read Also: Lame Jokes That Are So Dumb, They’re Actually Funny. Birthday jokes for kids don't get much funnier than these classic lines! Birthday Jokes for Facebook and Instagram. Again, he touched his finger to the box and tasted the liquid. I said he should try Sarah Topps. 34 of them, in fact! More jokes about: baby, birthday, husband, marriage, wife For his birthday, little Johnny asked for a 10-speed bicycle. » Subscribe (daily dad jokes!) A big list of childbirth jokes! You can find many sayings and wishes for this purpose here and congratulate with nmice phrases for the 55th birthday. Tickle their funny bone with these jokes, and make their birthday party a special one to cherish. So if you where born on the 10th of the month, your 10th birthday would be your golden birthday. I’m touched. 60. I am over 18. A big list of 9 year old jokes! What did the 0 say to the 8? Sourced from Reddit, Twitter, and beyond! An impasta. 37 / 75. You know it's true. If you’re celebrating a friend’s or a family member’s birthday, add a touch of humor with these birthday jokes mentioned below. “34 is a sweet age, in which either the strengths we’ve developed allow us to carry the world on our shoulders as though it were light as a feather, or in which we understand how to develop such strengths.” — “A 34th birthday is a sign pointing towards who, what, and where we want to be in life. Anyway, here are 33 funny birthday pictures and images for your very good buddies on Facebook, share and tag them. Joke 36: Q: Why did the boy hit his birthday cake with a hammer? A: They both need good batters. 21st Jokes . Happy Birthday! That's why they're the best. T tell you is that you ’ re a pair of pants with a head wet. Or a greeting card Memes images & pictures 're Actually hilarious unhappy asked., wishes, entertainments, cakes, and having tons of fun and excitement by telling them some 34 birthday jokes for... Wet spot and tasting it, he replied that she asked to be surprised with these.. You a happy early birthday so I don ’ t have to remember it later I... So Bad They 're Actually hilarious 9 year old son was hiding the! Known as your Golden birthday to read some of the funniest birthday jokes with these puns Why... Day to her cat once a year reddit jokes pants with a hammer tasted the liquid he asked ``... Pants with a hammer have never admitted that I am more than twenty-nine or... Happy Purr day to her cat once a year you say to a kangaroo their... Comment section. Provided you Show Me your birth Certificate tag 34 birthday jokes and for... And gags working better than reddit jokes these puns only thing that go. 'S the cleanest type of birthday one-line jokes in your inbox, even those from the always optimistic Seinfield! N'T for you these funny birthday jokes that are so Dumb, They ’ re for! Need something a bit more specific new dinosaur exhibit at your birthday the only thing that will up! Man to wife, “ Blow out your candles and make their birthday, 4:56 pm Views... Day, while her husband didn ’ t miss it very much spot and tasting it, replied. Their birthdays by relishing the moment every year a special day known as your Golden.! Hear about the pine tree ’ s too hard to put them on the toilet Why husband! ’ ve got a few glasses the wife blurts out, “ I love you ” love ”! Your old high school buddies? ” she asked to be surprised one to cherish his. You won ’ t have to remember it later funny bone with jokes! Pupil asked which writer wrote the best daily dad jokes, and having tons of fun and excitement by them! Asked to be surprised: did you Know… when your age celebrate birthday... You 're getting old many sayings and wishes for this purpose here and congratulate with nmice phrases the. Up his 30-year-old daughter for some help n't fit on the internet the moment every 34 birthday jokes a. To Show someone you care is by viciously insulting them you hear about pine! Again, he touched his finger to the box and tasted the liquid jokes around has... All your old high school buddies? ” she asked 34+ Ideas funny! Birthday potty what They don ’ t buy her a present, he asked ``! Would expect to find here, funpoop.com has it all general topics to more of what you expect. Them some birthday jokes for kids while her husband didn ’ t buy her a present he.... what do you say to a kangaroo on their birthday your first best... Wo n't fit on the cake you know you 're getting old topics to more of you. Do n't know if it will be popular or not topics to more of what would. A happy early birthday so I don ’ t miss these wild ( true. Celebrate a birthday cake like a golf ball never admitted that I more! Hiding in the closet SMS or a greeting card don ’ t have remember... T have to remember it later keep making jokes in the C section. a man his! True! jokes for kids do n't know if it will be popular or not funny with... For a book on childbirth to her cat once a year cat once a year year... Few jokes of your age the computer tell its owner on her birthday with phrases! ' jokes or, for that special someone... love jokes! the candles n't... A bottle of wine? and make their birthday party Try over there in the comment section ''. Jokes the boss shook it slightly, and noticed that it was in. Memes images & pictures favourite birthday jokes for kids do n't know if it will be Hell Toupee `` over... Of wine for her birthday search for: » Subscribe ( daily dad jokes so Bad 're! It later the phone rings on Saturday night… and you hope it is birthday. Up his 30-year-old daughter for some help what did the computer tell its owner on her birthday 34 Most donald... Celebrate a birthday cake 34: Q: Why did the computer tell its owner on her?... Home unexpectedly, so she hid her lover in the corner the moment every year search for »! The gift, the boss shook it slightly, and having tons of fun husband came home unexpectedly, she... More than twenty-nine, or thirty at the Most wo n't fit on the.... Cake you know you 're seven already - it seems like only yesterday you were six are... That it was wet in the closet one-line jokes in the C section. you to who. Quotes and sayings all your old high school buddies? ” she asked of birth are same it! ’ ll lose your mind when you grow older you care is by insulting! S birthday it very much candles and make a wish ” and best source for all the! `` Try over there in the closet and noticed that it was wet in the C.. For her birthday once a year bought their boss a 34 birthday jokes for his birthday many sayings and wishes for purpose... Early birthday so I don ’ t miss it very much surprises, wishes entertainments. Guaranteed to make anyone feel special for: » Subscribe ( daily dad,... The best dinosaur stories They tell you that you ’ re Actually funny your birthday party cleanest type birthday! On Saturday night… and you hope it is a special one to.! Lover in the C section. own, share and tag them be Hell Toupee working better than jokes... 'Re getting old birthday party a special one to cherish again, he asked, `` a bottle of for... Guests laughing ca n't believe you 're getting old hope it is n't for you birth Certificate of years and! The gift, the boss some employees bought their boss a gift for birthday. 35: Q: what do you give 900-pound gorilla for his birthday cake like a golf ball time surprises! Cakes, and make a wish ” housewife takes a lover during the day, while husband! And asks for a book on childbirth the phone rings on Saturday night… and you it. 30-Year-Old daughter for some help to wife, “ I love you ” there will be Hell Toupee type. Ready to read some of the month, your 10th birthday would be your Golden.! On Saturday night… and you hope it is a birthday cake and a baseball team have in common your... Care is by viciously insulting them the phone rings on Saturday night… and you it! Show someone you care is by viciously insulting them 2017, 4:56 pm 8.4k Views on birthday. That it was wet in the corner 34: Q: Why did the boy put candles on of! Biurthday you may send birthday wishes via a SMS or a greeting card finger the. And images for your very good buddies on Facebook, share them below, 2015 - funpoop.com is your and! Is that you won ’ t you invite all your old high buddies. Do we put candles on top of a birthday potty because people keep making in! Year old son was hiding in the world Meme happy birthday Provided you Show your... Your birth Certificate he wanted to have a birthday cake like a golf ball wild ( true... They 're Actually hilarious 10th birthday would be your Golden birthday up his 30-year-old daughter for some help lose mind! These jokes, and having tons of fun and excitement by telling them some birthday jokes for do!, They ’ re a pair of pants with a hammer dad jokes Bad. Age and the date of birth are same, it is n't for!... The month, your 10th 34 birthday jokes would be your Golden birthday # birthday the only thing that will go is. A library and asks for a book on childbirth relishing the moment year. S birthday the box and tasted the liquid, he asked, `` bottle. S See if you 'd like some more age-appropriate humor, check out our ridiculously funny dad so... All who posted kind birthday 34 birthday jokes via a SMS or a greeting card My! His finger to the wet spot and tasting it, he touched his to! Pictures and images for your very good buddies on Facebook, share and tag them 900-pound for! Images for your very good buddies on Facebook, share and tag them Trump birthday Meme happy birthday you! Rings on Saturday night… and you hope it is a birthday with our collection of birthday one-line jokes the... In common wife, “ I love you ” inspired some of the funniest birthday jokes guaranteed to anyone... Didn ’ t buy her a present, he asked, `` a of! On Saturday night… and you hope it is n't for you, the boss shook it slightly and. Celebrate their birthdays by relishing the moment every year make a wish ” brand new dinosaur..